A Day at The Grocery Store

A Case of the Missing Zombie Dolls Arm.

Other wise known as, A day the Grocery Store.

I usually have about an hour and a half to grocery shop with only Squeal until I have to pick up Shout from Kindergarten. I run out of the house in clothes that are  easy to find and sometimes I don’t even have time to brush my hair. Glamorous I know.

Going grocery shopping with one kid is better than going with three, but still not my favorite thing. So instead of comparing it to being  as bad as the Dentist it is probably as bad as having an OB appointment. You get the point.

I usually try to have all my meal planning done and am ready to conquer the evil known as the grocery store. I really want Squeal to be good so I usually give her something to play with or let her run a muck just so she’s happy. This particular time I let her bring a brand new Birthday present that Shout had just received a few days earlier. It was a Zombie Doll given to her by her Grandpa. Grandpa’s give awesome presents don’t you think?

Squeal actually got into the front of the cart. She never does that! I was excited and started the shopping. I played  race car with the cart and let her put all the produce into bags. About 20 minutes into our shopping I notice that Zombie doll was missing an arm! A small gray elbow to hand arm. I immediately started back tracking and asking every employee if they had seen an arm on the floor. I am sure they all thought I was out of my mind but it is probably not the strangest request I am sure. I knew shout would be so upset but we had to sacrifice the arm and forge ahead It was a Zombie Doll after all and how long was the arm going to stay attached before being lost in the abyss known as my daughters room. The battle had to be won. Full speed ahead.

By the time I was done I was exhausted. I had gotten everything I had needed and more, I was ready to check out. After a not so pleasant checker outer person (is that the official name?) It was time to leave.  while putting squeal in her seat I noticed the prized zombie girl arm in her car seat. That mystery was finally solved! I thought my worries were over.

I quickly was putting the cart in  the return thing when some shady looking car slowed next to me. The passenger rolled down his window and said to me. “You are looking Hot today” Seriously?!?!? No I was not looking hot at all! Not even in the slightest. He then of course followed by asking me if I wanted to buy perfume. umm NO! Does that work on anyone? Maybe if you actually thought I was hot. No, not really. But I seriously doubt anyone EVER buys perfume in a parking lot. I was so glad to be finally done only to obviously have to return in a week. So. not. fair.

What’s the most horrible grocery shopping experience you have ever had?

{ 1 comment… add one }

  • Jen October 4, 2011, 4:26 PM

    I have so many horrible experiences at the grocery store with my kids. When my son was little he would sit in the cart and shake his head, violently from side to side. Other women would look at me with pity for having to bring this clearly disturbed child to the grocery store. There was nothing wrong with him he just liked being dizzy.

    However the worst was when I brought my daughter to Walmart, she was about 2 at the time, and she was in the big part of the cart.

    Oh, it’s so horrible I can’t even type it without getting sick to my stomach and having flash backs,

    She was in the big part of the cart while I was looking for something and thus not looking at her. As I glanced at her I could see her on the edge of the cart and going over, head first, to the concrete floor below.

    It was horrible. Thankfully, she somersaulted over the cart and must have landed on her butt rather than her head though she did have a goose egg on her head there was no cracked skull or blood anywhere. I gathered the screaming child and avoided the mean and nasty looks from two older women who watched the whole thing happen in slow motion. I drove as fast as I safely could to the pediatrician which happened to be only a couple of blocks away. She was fine but it scared the living crap out of me.

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