Yesterday I dropped off my two oldest daughters to their first day of school. We were prepared. Their outfits were adorable, Their hair super cute. They had an awesome breakfast. Everything was planned out and perfect. What I was not prepared for is my emotions. I know it is typical to feel sadness and worry on the first day of school but this was not my first rodeo. I had been excited and thrilled about the new found freedom I would have. I love the organization that school brings and the time I would have to get things done.
A lot is different about this year. My girls are at a brand new school where we do not know hardly anyone. A school that hardly anyone in our neighborhood goes to for various reasons. A school I researched and saw the good in and decided to take a chance in despite what others said. This school has an amazing amount of cultures and languages. I really feel like it will be an awesome experience for my kids. It is not easy for me to go against the grain. I really am a go with the flow kind of person I do not like to be different. So when I dropped off my little girls today at the front of the school to go to their classrooms I officially lost it. My ugly cry reared it’s ugly head and the tears would not stop.
I doubted myself. I wondered if I had made the right decision for my girls. I know we all love are children with a fierceness and I felt that today. Would they be ok? Would everyone be nice to them? As I was walked home with my younger two daughters sobbing uncontrollably I could not help but think about something I told my girls last night over dinner. I told them to not be afraid. To be strong. I told them no matter what their Heavenly Father would be with them. We even read this scripture
When I was talking to them over dinner last night I was saying this all for them. telling them stories about times I had been nervous in my life and how I overcame them. I did not have any clue that I would need this advice as much, if not more than they did.
I know it will get easier and I know this because I can lean on my Heavenly Father to get through these times. That he will be with me no matter what is going on and especially no matter how many times I ugly cry . That gives me comfort for today.